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21 Hilarious, Rib-tickling Excuses Children Give To Bunk School

“I have potty on my skirt.” I was 10 when I purposely sat on my breakfast and made an excuse to bunk school. While it was a dirty skirt on one day, it was a fake cough on another. I’m sure all of you have made excuses to bunk school at one time or another. Sometimes our excuses were intelligent lies while at other we got caught due to the sheer innocence of the white lies. These days, even preschoolers are smarty pants. They make excuses to bunk school and parents have tough time deciding whether to humour them or to be worried for their lack of interest in school.

Whatever their parent’s choice, kid’s excuses are hilarious.

21 Funny And Amusing Excuses To Bunk School For You To Read And Enjoy:

1) “Mom burnt my milk!”

Three-year-old Nishant told his playschool teacher that he missed school the previous day because his mom burnt his milk. He doesn’t come to school without drinking milk. But ask his mom and she has no clue about anything burning anywhere!

2) “My dog asked me to stay home.”

Awww! What an adorable dog who talks. In love with his in-your-excuses-world-I-can-talk-too Poodle, seven-year-old Piyush missed school. Teacher Sudha had lots to talk with Piyush’s mom the next day!

3) “I’m not a boy. I’m a humphead parrotfish.”

This one is from my private space. My five-year-old woke up to throw hundreds of tantrums to not go to school. When I told him all boys and girls go to school, he came up with this stupendous response. Sigh!

4) “There was a mouse in my cupboard and it ate my uniform. We were getting a new one made.”

Mini’s teacher is lenient with kids. So much so that when Tina came up with this reason for having missed school the whole of last week, all she did was smile. Only, Tina’s parents know the earful that they got from the teacher!

5) “I was really sick tomorrow.”

Well, this one is not an excuse. Abiraj, a two-and-a-half, had missed school ‘yesterday’ due to cough and cold. Adorable aren’t they, these two-year-olds?

6) “My mom didn’t give me breakfast so I waited till lunch time.”

Gargi is a six-year-old prankster whose excuses are worthy of a book. This one is the latest one from her repertoire. Her teacher even notes them down. Classic, isn’t it?

7) “I can’t find my library bag!”

The bag that’s cosily sleeping under the mattress and will take his mom hours to find! Daksh doesn’t like school–doesn’t like his library bag either. Likes making excuses and how!

8) “Pirates don’t need to go to school.”

Kailash is seven and knows that being a pirate is his true calling in life. Since that doesn’t need a school, he doesn’t want to go there anymore. Justified, isn’t it?

9) “Papa asked me to stay at home and take care of you.”

Siddhant is a very caring child. His mom is unwell and his papa has asked him not to trouble her but take care of her. But who said anything about missing school? Kids I tell you!

10) “Teacher gave enough homework for the whole week. I’ll go next week now.”

Yes. Farhan is a big boy at seven. He knows how much work is to be done during a week. So, he’ll go to school only when he needs more homework. Can you outwit this excuse?

11) “The teacher said that I should stay at home with my naughtiness.”

Should we check with Ananya’s teacher for this one? But what else can you expect from a five-year-old naughty kiddo?

12) “I’m dizzy. I dreamt I was in that roller coaster again.”

“We took him to a park on Sunday and he gave us this excuse to bunk school for the next four days until Thursday. Finally, we told him let’s not go to a park ever again so Friday morning he was cool to go to school!” –Five-year-old Nishit’s mom, Smita.

13) “I have issues and Spiderman is coming over to solve them. Can’t go to school.”

I wonder the issues this five-year-old has in his life. Whatever the ‘issues’ may be, I’m sure Rahul’s mom will have them sorted out and Spiderman must have been spared the hard work!

14) “They’re painting the school so I can’t go.”

Jiya’s society building is being painted and to avoid the dust, her parents have temporarily moved to her grandma’s house. In her full-of-excuses, storytelling world, her school is being painted. So shouldn’t she miss school too? Let’s answer this excuse for Jiya’s parents. Should we?

15) “Grandma has lost her glasses and she needs me.”

Since the painting excuse didn’t work with Jiya’s parents, she came up with this one almost without batting her eyelids. What’s cooking next Jiya?

16) “I worked very hard in school yesterday. I need a break.”

Looks like six-year-old Kartik’s teacher made him break bricks in school and now he needs a break from all that breaking!

17) “It’s too hot today. Schools remain shut during hot summer days.”

…and during very rainy days, on winter mornings, on days when the Sun is shining and on days when it’s not. Five-year-old Smayan doesn’t understand why schools have to open in the first place!

18) “I cannot find my classroom in school.”

This one is an unbeatable one coming from six-year-old Aditya. What a brilliantly lame excuse to miss school. Don’t you think?

19) “I think I’ll be coughing today.”

I’m Sahil. I’m seven and I’m an expert at predicting the future which is why I also know that I’m going to pass school without attending it. I wish he could predict that this excuse will not be helping him miss school that day or any day!

20) “Don’t you need help cleaning the house?”

Since Rashmi’s mom is such a stickler for cleaning and toils every morning to keep the kitchen spot free, the five-year-old thinks it’s better to help out at home than go to school. Someone please tell her that her excuse is not working!

21) “I feel like spending time with you.”

I think Mihir is watching too many mushy soaps on TV! How else would you you explain such a sloppy excuse coming from a six-year-old who runs out of the house to play with his friends every spare minute he gets?

Perhaps he means spending time with his football! Our tech-savvy, new-age kids are far beyond the “I’m not well” or “I have a tummy ache”—type lame excuses that we used to make as kids. Time to pull up our socks against these smarty pants. What say?

What are some of the hilarious excuses that your kids have used to bunk school? Share a few with us.

Image Credits: Rafiq Sarlie;

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Categories: Parenting
Amrita Minocha: Mother to a five-year-old, Amrita Minocha is essentially a teacher. She teaches GRE/GMAT/IELTS verbal courses, English as a second language (TESOL), and Yoga! An MBA in HR, she enjoys juggling between diverse roles. A hardcore bookworm who aims to pen a book someday, she currently writes GRE verbal samples, activity books for kids, and actively blogs on the Flintobox blog.
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